im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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