You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?