just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere