Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Randomize
