every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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