We're facebook friends in real life
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
