she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize
