I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize