This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize