i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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