So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
