Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize