chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
