Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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