GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Every concussion has its silver lining
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
