sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
she peed on how many people?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize