There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize