im drinking this country out of the recession.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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