party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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