Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize