Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
