Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
