Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize