THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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