normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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