he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
He did a backflip because drugs
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
