took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
he shaved USA in his pubs
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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