you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
