apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
We left an ass print on the piano.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
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