i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
