BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize
