Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
