This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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