I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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