i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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