bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize