i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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