Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
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She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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