if you like me you must not know who I am
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
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