How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize