He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
