lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
