dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
This is the prime rib incident all over again
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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