Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
