I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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