her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
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