nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize