walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
