Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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