"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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