I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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